Piss
I guess it is a lousy day when you go to take a crap at work and the toilet seat that you sit on is wet from the piss of the guy before. Usually I am quite adept at checking out the bowl before I sit down, but somehow this one got away from me. I even placed one of those toilet seat liners down before I sat. Unfortunately it didn’t lay down flat on the seat until my butt cheeks pressed against it. By then it was too late and all I could do was get some paper towels, wipe down my leg and move to another stall.
This wasn’t the only piss issue I had to deal with today. I decided to stop by the men’s room for a quick one before my subway ride home. This was a dreadful mistake. Because of the time I took to relieve myself, I had just missed a subway train as it pulled out of the station. The next train took over 20 minutes to arrive, was already packed and I wasn’t able to get my usual seat. Next time I just hold it in until I get home. To add insult to injury when I got off the train, I realized that I left something under my seat and had to dart back on to retrieve it. The doors closed before I could get back off and then the train went express taking me many stops beyond my destination. Ugh!
I’ll probably have to skip my morning workout tomorrow since I am schedule to give a presentation to a large audience (around 100 people). I don’t want to take a chance on being late and don’t want to have to worry about anything beforehand. I am not nervous about it, I just don’t want to stress about getting in a workout and then driving out to Long Island for an early morning meeting. Maybe I can stop at Eisenhower Park on the way home for a swim. I wonder how many people piss in the pool.
This wasn’t the only piss issue I had to deal with today. I decided to stop by the men’s room for a quick one before my subway ride home. This was a dreadful mistake. Because of the time I took to relieve myself, I had just missed a subway train as it pulled out of the station. The next train took over 20 minutes to arrive, was already packed and I wasn’t able to get my usual seat. Next time I just hold it in until I get home. To add insult to injury when I got off the train, I realized that I left something under my seat and had to dart back on to retrieve it. The doors closed before I could get back off and then the train went express taking me many stops beyond my destination. Ugh!
I’ll probably have to skip my morning workout tomorrow since I am schedule to give a presentation to a large audience (around 100 people). I don’t want to take a chance on being late and don’t want to have to worry about anything beforehand. I am not nervous about it, I just don’t want to stress about getting in a workout and then driving out to Long Island for an early morning meeting. Maybe I can stop at Eisenhower Park on the way home for a swim. I wonder how many people piss in the pool.
posted by Rebel at 9:29 PM
1 Comments:
Well Charles, I'm glad you asked. See, as serious collegiate swimmers, we were not allowed to leave the pool during workout. You'd miss part of a set if you got out to pee. And your teammates would hate you. So we all let loose at least once or twice during practice. 30 people X the average number of fluid ounces per piss = how many gallons of urine per day X six workouts per week. You do the math! But CHILL people, urine is sterile!
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